On March 27th, Mike and I took a two hour drive up to the mountains to Granby, Colorado to a timeshare. It was Mike's spring break and we wanted for him to have time at home to decompress, but we also wanted to get away for a couple of days.
We checked into the timeshare condo around 4:30 p.m. At 5:30 p.m., my mobile rang. It was the adoption agency telling us that a baby boy had been born that morning and we were to make our way to the hospital to meet him and the birthmother.
We repacked the car after only being in the condo for an hour. We then drove and made our way to the hospital to meet the baby.
We decided to name the baby Russell Alan Vredevoogd. We were thrilled. We knew that we would love our child, but never imagined how quickly and how deeply. We brought him home on March 29th, 2013.
Russell on the car ride home from the hospital
Me (Kristin) getting to know her son
Russell sleeping in what we call the "touchdown" position
We
spent two and a half weeks with this beautiful baby boy. We had
professional newborn photos taken, we were purchasing baby items,
setting up the nursery, and receiving baby gifts. We took walks in the
park behind our house.
The morning of April 15th we were called and told that his birthfather had decided to parent. A social worker came that night to pick Russell up and take him to his birthfather.
We are more deeply hurt than ever before in our lives! We are heartbroken and grieving this loss. Yesterday, April 27th, Russell turned one month old. We are faced with constant reminders of this beautiful baby as we washed his clothes and bottles, look through the professional photographs, and see the many baby items around the house. Today while in public at Costco, I started tearing up as I saw a baby in the same car seat we have and used for Russell.
After waiting for two years, we were parents. We are now faced with the decision of when to be put back on the adoption books. We need and want time to grieve, but I also feel the clock of parenthood and a successful adoption ticking.
We thought our prayers of a baby had been answered. What is God's plan and purpose in this? We may never know. I am angry, hurt, heartbroken, confused, and devastated all at the same time. We are grieving desperately. I know we are not the only ones to experience this situation. I feel blessed by the love, prayers, and support of family and friends during this difficult time.
The morning of April 15th we were called and told that his birthfather had decided to parent. A social worker came that night to pick Russell up and take him to his birthfather.
We are more deeply hurt than ever before in our lives! We are heartbroken and grieving this loss. Yesterday, April 27th, Russell turned one month old. We are faced with constant reminders of this beautiful baby as we washed his clothes and bottles, look through the professional photographs, and see the many baby items around the house. Today while in public at Costco, I started tearing up as I saw a baby in the same car seat we have and used for Russell.
After waiting for two years, we were parents. We are now faced with the decision of when to be put back on the adoption books. We need and want time to grieve, but I also feel the clock of parenthood and a successful adoption ticking.
We thought our prayers of a baby had been answered. What is God's plan and purpose in this? We may never know. I am angry, hurt, heartbroken, confused, and devastated all at the same time. We are grieving desperately. I know we are not the only ones to experience this situation. I feel blessed by the love, prayers, and support of family and friends during this difficult time.
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